A father duck needs to overcome his fear of water, to save his son.
1. Father duck can be seen around the pond showing actions of being afraid of the water.
2. His Son Is out in the middle of the lake dancing around on a rock.
3. The son slips and falls into the water, and because hes so young starts flailing around
4. Father duck panics and finds something to throw to his son but it is not long enough to reach
5. the son can be seen struggling and goes under
6. the father panics more runs around, then bravens up and jumps in after his son.
7. the father realizes water isint so bad and can be seen teaching his son to swim.
3 comments:
I think this is a really good base concept. I think the audience will care about a father overcoming his fear and saving his child...unless they have no compassion at all! The only thing is...I think there are soooo many ways you can get this same concept across with more interesting characters and/or setting. Unless the ducks are really, really interesting ducks or it is animated really, really well, I think the animation might be forgettable.
If you go back to the base concept of simply a father overcoming his fear and saving his child and take if from there...you could come up with some cool, memorable characters and get the same point across.
What helped me a lot when I took this same class last year was when Greg told us to look to art history for inspiration. He said that there has been thousands of years of people drawing "characters". Look at ancient cultures and how they used crazy proportions and exaggerations. Maybe go to the library and look at books from some crazy ancient civilization or something like that.
Or maybe you can start by creating a different environment. Besides water being really hard to model and animate...you might be able to come up with something more creative than the pond. I think you should go wild with it!!! Good luck and have fun!
It is okay i can see the actions that you want the audience to see but you don't have to describe what they are doing by going about it like it is a manual. Go back and look over the story again and change words around because in your second sentence you made it into a lake and not a pond. So make sure that the story itself is very coherent and your not changing what your saying as your thought processes go along. Also the word choices are okay but make it more a story instead of again describing the story. Don't make your audience feel stupid when reading this story. Finally the ending is very fragmented as their is no ending, does the father save the son, or does he just teach him to swim. So when ending the story tell the audience what is going on instead of just ending it by using a very generic ending like they lived happily ever after. Its just so broad of an ending and is really left open. It should be more closed and final when finishing your story.
This story pretty good..but whats going to make your character different from any other duck....u don't want to use just an ordinary duck. You want you character to be remeberable. So that stand out of the ordinary. Maybe explain why the dad afraid of water? Maybe bad experience with water when young. good start
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